Like the whole world wants to listen to me whine...NOT

My mother just called me to remind me that we leave for Ireland/Scotland 2 weeks from today and I haven't done enough to suit her. I can't defend myself because she's paying for the trip and my job is to do EVERYTHING else, which, because it's a self-drive tour, means getting the rental cars in both countries, figuring out money conversions for 2 countries, insurance, where to stay (are we REALLY supposed to call just one day in advance to the B&B's places we want to stay in? Sounds cracky to me). I'll need a list of tourist attractions and fields full of cows and sheep (because I want to just "happen" on an un-touristy stone circle and dance there under a full moon (there will be one on July 26th, while we're still in Ireland) and play with the faeries and Moon Goddesses. My mother will be blissfully unaware of this craic-headedness, of course.

Anyway, I'm stressed. The luau is one of my favorite things in the world and I've got 3 stories eating my brain that want to come out but first I have to finish the love meme, which takes me a long time since I tend to say a lot plus this year I'll only have a computer for half the trip (damn Ryanair) and before that I'll be packing and soothing my mother and if she'd hush up maybe I COULD plan the trip fast enough to suit her. I have a questions though:

Apparently Ryanair sucks sucks SUX!!! They charge for everything, even breathing. Seriously, they're even gonna charge for the breathing machine I have to carry because of my chronic pneumonia, according to my travel agent. She's a bitch who LOVES to give bad news. My husband, who has done most of my travel agent's job for her, says there's no other option from Ireland to Scotland by plane on July 21st, and the travel agent says that taking the ferry between the two countries is a nightmare. (I wanted to take the ferry because I like water and I hate to fly!) She says the waves are horrible and my mother and I will both be puking by the time we get to Scotland. Is this true, or is the travel agent getting kickbacks from Ryanair?

On a happier note, I LOVE all the love I got from the love meme, but I'm ashamed because it all says I'm such a positive person...and here I am bitching my head off. SO, here's a HAPPY for you: I got a beautiful postcard from my beautiful LJ darlin' siluria! It's from Yellowstone (so magnificent), and I haven't been there since I was 14. I want to go back but this world is too big to see it all twice (or even everything once) *sad sigh*. It sounds like siluria is having the trip of a lifetime and I am jealous, and it is just STUPID that I'll be so close to where she lives but I won't have time to come see her. Siluria, are you not coming to the GFG? Do I have to come and kidnap you in your sleep? I'm one big DUH when it comes to geography but if it can be done I'll do it!

It's HOT here. I hear it's cooler there. My mother keeps telling me that it'll be near freezing in the mornings and then very warm in the afternoons so I should pack accordingly, but then she tells me I can't pack hardly anything because Ryanair charges $40 (that's 30 English #'s, I think) for a 44# checked bag and an arm and a leg for any more than that, and only one small carry-on bag...there I go, bitching again. I am going to Ireland! I am going to get a green tattoo! I am going to Scotland! I'm going to meet more of my favorite flisters! I hope toestastegood et al. don't tattoo me in my sleep or if they do, it's something pretty. I am going to see the Highlands and lots of sheep and cows (so they tell me - they cause traffic jams - unlike the sheep and cows we rarely see here) and maybe a faerie and definitely a drunken Irishman. I'm re-learning Irish drinking songs...Toes, are the Scottish more well-behaved, or do they have songs for me, too?

Soon I can check this off my bucket list, and afterward I won't cry because it's over but smile because it happened!